When to Leave - Faithfulness or Foolishness?

This episode explores the crucial question for church leaders: are they staying due to faithfulness or foolishness? We discuss loyalty, fear, and pride's impact on this decision, alongside actionable steps to gain clarity on one's motives. 

• Exploring the tension between faithfulness and foolishness 
• Examining common traps: fear, misplaced loyalty, and pride 
• Ignoring warning signs and the harm it causes 
• The importance of aligning decisions with values and calling 
• Practical steps for assessing motives 
• The role of reflection, feedback, and prayer in decision-making

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:07

Hi there, welcome to the Healthy Church Staff Podcast. My name is Todd Rhodes. I'm your friend, hopefully and co-founder over at chemistrystaffingcom. Thanks so much for joining me on this daily journey toward, hopefully, healthier leadership and ministry in all of our churches. Today we're going to be talking about a question that I think every church leader has wrestled with at some point. I know I have. Here it is Am I staying out of faithfulness or am I staying out of foolishness? That seems rather harsh, but we just started on Monday of this week. If you missed any of the episodes, you can go back and listen. But we started a brand new series inspired by Wade Hodges' book when to Leave. The subtitle is how to Know it's Time to Move On Before you Stay Too Long, and we'll explore the fine line today between perseverance and stubbornness. Ouch, and by the end of this episode, hopefully, I hope you'll have some clarity on what's keeping you where you are and whether it's time to rethink your path Again.

Speaker 1: 1:11

This podcast series, even though it's called when to Leave, this is not a podcast where I'm trying to talk you into leaving your church, goodness, no that. I would love for you to be able to stay exactly where you are. But I also know that it's January, it's the first of the year, and I know that many people are trying to figure out God, where do you want me to be? Where do you want me to be this year? Where do you want me to be next year, for the next five years? And a lot of times, this question should I stay or should I go man? This is the question that a lot of us are constantly. Sometimes it's in the back of our mind, on the back burner. Sometimes things happen and it's on our front burner. But that's what we're talking about here on this series.

Speaker 1: 1:54

And let's start with the word faithfulness. Okay, it's a word that we hear all the time and it's deeply rooted in our calling. But sometimes what we call faithfulness, it could be fear or pride, or a refusal to admit that it's time to move on. And Wade challenges us to ask some hard questions. I'm going to share these here with you today. I think they're going to be really helpful to you.

Speaker 1: 2:23

Some hard questions about our motives for staying. And here are some of the common traps that we fall in. The first is just fear of failure. Are you staying because you're afraid of what people will think when you leave. Fear isn't faithfulness and it can be a roadblock to growth. So are you staying just because you're afraid of what people will think if you leave? Second is misplaced loyalty. Loyalty to your church absolutely is important, but staying out of guilt or obligation can do more harm than good to you and to the church. So maybe there's misplaced loyalty, maybe there's pride. Sometimes we're so invested in proving ourselves right that we ignore the signs that it's time to let go. So staying shouldn't be about winning a battle, okay. And then number four ignoring the signs.

Speaker 1: 3:19

Wade points out that staying faithful while ignoring clear signs of toxicity or dysfunction, when it comes right down to it, it's not really noble, it's not really faithful, it's harmful. Faithfulness doesn't mean enduring the unbearable, and the key to align your decision with your calling and your values is to. The key actually is to align your decision with your calling in your values, not with fear or pride or guilt. How can you tell if you're staying out of faithfulness or foolishness? Here's the bottom line for today Examine your why. Examine your why with honesty and with humility, and here are three steps that I'd love for you to take today. If you're really, this is a front burner issue for you. Am I going to stay? Am I going to go this year? Here's some things to do. First of all, ask the tough questions. The first question why am I staying? Is it out of love and purpose or calling, or is it more on the negative side? Is it more because of pride or fear? Secondly, get some honest feedback. Talk to a mentor, talk to your spouse, talk to a trusted friend. They might see some blind spots that you've missed. And then, praying at the beginning of your journey, take your motives to God in prayer, ask for wisdom to discern whether you're being faithful or whether you're holding on for all the wrong reasons. So here's your action step today. Take a few minutes today.

Speaker 1: 4:50

I don't know if you're a journaler or not. If you're a journaler, journal If you're not, just grab a piece of paper and write down. I always find that writing things down for me really crystallizes and really helps get my brain to move. So get out a piece of paper and a pen and write down why you're staying in your current role, even if you're not even thinking about leaving. Write down why you're staying. Be brutally honest. Even if you're not even thinking about leaving, write down why you're staying. Be brutally honest. This is for your eyes only. What's your driving decision to stay? Sometimes, just putting it on paper can help you see things a little bit more clearly.

Speaker 1: 5:24

Are you wrestling with this question, this whole question? Should I stay, should I leave? I'd love to hear your story. You can email me anytime. Podcast at chemistrystaffingcom. Would love to hear from you your thoughts and experiences could help shape future episodes as well, and I'd love to share some encouragement to you. Also, don't forget to subscribe if you're not subscribed to this podcast, so you'll get notified and don't miss a single episode. We're here every day, monday through Friday, and if your church is helping, needing some help in finding your next staff member, reach out to me as well. I'd love to partner with you in my work at Chemistry Staffing. You can email me. Podcast at chemistrystaffingcom and I believe I said at the beginning of this podcast if you're enjoying this series, if you're interested at all, you can download an absolutely free copy of Wade Hodges' book when to Leave.

Speaker 1: 6:17

It's packed with wisdom for leaders and for helping you make decisions, including what we talked about today. You can download a free copy of that today. Chemistrystaffingcom slash when dash two, dash leave chemistrystaffingcom slash when dash two dash leave chemistrystaffingcom slash when dash to dash leave. Thanks for spending some time with me today here on the podcast. Remember, faithfulness is about aligning with your calling and your values, not clinging to something out of fear or pride. You have what it takes to discern the difference. You really do, and you're not alone in this journey. Okay, take care, I'll see you again tomorrow right here on the Healthy Church Staff Podcast. You