Difficult People in Ministry: The Dodgers

Ever scratched your head, trying to figure out how to engage the quiet maverick in your church team? Well, scratch no more! Join Todd Rhoades of Chemistry Staffing and me as we tackle the enigma of the 'Dodger'—those church staff and volunteers who shy away from the spotlight. We're not just talking about the challenges here; we're providing solutions to draw them out and weave their unique threads into the rich tapestry of your ministry community. Based on the insights from Chris Surratt's article, our discussion is a goldmine of strategies to ensure everyone, from the loudest to the most reserved, finds their voice and value within your group.

In our enlightening chat, you'll discover the subtleties of creating a safe space where every personality can flourish, even those who prefer the backseat. We emphasize the power of one-on-one interactions and the importance of building trust, particularly with those who may have faced past hurts or simply need a little more time to open up. It's a practical guide, replete with fun, non-invasive ways to connect. Whether you're an extroverted leader or a self-identified Dodger, this conversation promises to reshape your understanding of team dynamics and lead you toward a more inclusive, cooperative ministry. So, pour a fresh cup of coffee, and let's unwrap the gift of quiet contributions together.

Have questions or comments? Send to podcast@chemistrystaffing.com

Be sure to subscribe to The Healthy Church Staff Podcast wherever you regularly listen to podcasts.

- - - - -

Is Your Church Hiring?
If your church is searching for a new staff member, reach out to Todd for a conversation on how he might be able to help.

Are You Looking for a New Ministry Role?
If you are open to a new church role in the next few months, add your free resume and profile at ChemistryStaffing.com.

Transcript

Speaker 0: 0:03

Hey there, welcome to the Heli Church staff podcast. My name is Todd Rhodes, I'm one of the co-founders of chemistry staffingcom and thank you so much for joining us today. We're in the middle, smack dab middle. It's hump day, right. I always remember that old visit, a Geico commercial, where the camel commenced at home. It's hump day here on the podcast Wednesday, and we're looking at four different types of difficult people that you're going to deal with in 2024.

Speaker 0: 0:32

Yesterday we talked about the dominator. Today we're going to talk about what we call the Dodger, and these four types of difficult people come actually from an article from my friend, chris Surad, over at Lifewaycom from a couple years ago, called four difficult people you'll encounter in ministry and how to handle them. Now, chris is a small groups pastor, so he's looking at these types of difficult people more in a groups, leading a group setting. But man is we're staff members. If you're a staff member at your church, you're dealing with groups all the time, whether it's a group of volunteers or a board meeting or whatever. So we're going to look today at the Dodger. Okay, so the Dodger is the person who just avoids engaging in discussion and they keep their thoughts and their feelings to themselves. Okay, so this can drive you crazy, especially if you're a raving extrovert. I'm more of an introvert, but and I can be a Dodger at times not a lot, but sometimes. But if you're an extrovert, dodgers can really just drive you crazy. They might be shy, they might be insecure, they might be indifferent, they might just be a raving introvert, but sometimes they also can miss out on the benefits and the blessings of being part of the community. So it's your job as a leader to work with the Dodger and to try and help them to feel safe, to feel included and to make them feel like they are valuable to the group and it's good to have them contribute.

Speaker 0: 2:04

Okay, so how can you, as a staff member, handle the Dodgers that you're going to encounter? In a way that's gentle and encouraging and helpful to them and effective? First of all, get to know them. Don't force them to talk. Give them opportunities to share, but don't force them to. Some people just need a little bit more time and space. Maybe it's their personality, maybe they've been bruised in the past and just want to take their time. Just respect their pace, respect their personality. Don't put them on the spot, don't pressure them, don't embarrass them. But I've been in groups where people where Dodgers are embarrassed and guilted into sharing Don't do that. But I think the key here is really with the Dodgers is to try and get to know them, and not just in a group setting but one-on-one. A lot of times Dodgers are quite in a group setting. I know I am. I sit in groups sometimes and look at maybe yesterday we talked about dominators, people that dominate the conversation, and I am not that person. I'm more of a Dodger than a Dominator. I will talk and I will speak up, but only when I feel like I've got something valuable to the conversation.

Speaker 0: 3:10

Go with the Dodgers in both group settings and personal settings, just to you got to kind of try and get to know them Particularly one-on-one. Get with them one-on-one, ask them some simple or some fun questions. Ask questions that aren't too personal to start off with. Ask questions that aren't too hard. Maybe they're simple, maybe they're fun. Maybe you can ask them about their hobbies or their interests or their favorites or maybe their opinions, those kind of things.

Speaker 0: 3:39

But just arranging for a time to chat, maybe one-on-one, arrange for some coffee or lunch, and sometimes you'll find that the Dodger may be a totally different person, one-on-one, than what they are in a group or a volunteer group setting, and they just may need to feel more comfortable. They may need to get to talk to you and you may need to get a little bit of their trust. Maybe, like I said, maybe they've been hurt a little bit in the past. If you've got some people that you just feel are, they might even be really dedicated people and part of your team, but you just feel distant. They're just. I don't know if they're standoffish or they just don't share a lot. They seem rather guarded. Get to know those people. Try to arrange Maybe you've got somebody in mind, arrange a coffee date or time to take them out to lunch. Just let them know that you care about them and that you want to get to know them better. Of course, for them that, hey, you are a valuable part of this community and this church and our team here. Use the opportunity to encourage them to. Hey, you've got some valuable input. Be sure you you feel free to share that from time to time with other members of the group.

Speaker 0: 4:53

Dodgers, are they difficult? Yeah, they can be. Maybe, as I said, as an extroverted leader, you might find them more annoying than difficult. But it really comes down to how well do you know them? Get to know them better, talk to them, get them to slowly open up. Most and I speak this as a fellow Dodger, most people who are Dodgers will open up if you give them enough time, enough opportunity and you invest in them. Okay, so we've looked at the dominators and the Dodgers. Tomorrow we're going to continue with our difficult type of person, number three. Oh, this is a good one, this will be a good one. Make sure you subscribe and come back and join us tomorrow as we talk about the debaters.