The Pros, Cons, and Cautions of Hiring Relatives at Your Church

Ever wondered if hiring your sister-in-law or Cousin Vinny for your church staff could be a good idea? Today on the Healthy Church Staff podcast, Todd Rhoades, co-founder of ChemistryStaffing.com, explore the heartwarming yet potentially tumultuous terrain of hiring relatives onto your church team. From the built-in trust and shared vision that family can bring, to the thorny issues of perceived favoritism and nepotism, we dig into the rich soil of both benefits and pitfalls. Get ready to learn how to navigate the complexities of familial ties in a professional setting, and why having clear policies in place is crucial before any job offers are extended.

In this episode, I break down the pros such as efficient communication and reduced onboarding time, juxtaposed with cons like blurred boundaries and limited perspectives. We’ll consider how to maintain a professional atmosphere while fostering personal connections, and what it might mean for the dynamics of your church staff. Tune in for practical advice on establishing clear guidelines to help avoid conflicts of interest and ensure a healthy, cohesive team, whether or not you decide to hire family members. This conversation is packed with insights aimed at helping you create a thriving church environment while making informed hiring decisions.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:07

Hi there, welcome to the Healthy Church Staff podcast. My name is Todd Rhodes. I'm one of the co-founders over at chemistrystaffingcom, also your host right here on the Healthy Church Staff podcast. Today we're venturing into some territory that can be both heartwarming and heartache inducing, and that's hiring relatives on a church staff. Now, many churches do not have any policy about hiring relatives husbands, wives, sons, daughters, aunts, uncles, cousins, those kind of things. Some churches have policies on that, some churches don't. A couple weeks ago, or I think last week, we did a series on whether or not you should hire internal candidates people that are from your church. We're going to drill down even a little bit further today and talk about whether you should hire internal candidates or family members. Now, the idea of working alongside family and ministry might sound appealing. It might sound very unappealing. After all, who's better to share your passion and your vision and your values than those that are close to you? And there's also some built-in trust and shared history. That could be a real asset. But before you start drafting that job offer to Cousin Vinny or your sister-in-law, let's take a close look at some potential benefits and some drawbacks from this family affair.

Speaker 1: 1:27

First, let's look at some of the advantages to hiring relatives. We already mentioned shared passion and vision. Often relatives will share a deep commitment to the church's passion and mission and values and fostering a unified sense of purpose. They also, a lot of times, will bring some built-in trust and loyalty. They can create a strong foundation of trust and loyalty and mutual support within the team. Efficient communication Relatives may have a shorthand communication style that can streamline decision-making and problem-solving. There's reduced onboarding time. Family members are already familiar with the church culture, minimizing the learning curve and you can accelerate their integration into your team. And this is big in some churches. A sense of legacy In some cases, hiring relatives can create a sense of continuity and legacy within the church. Okay, so those are some of the things that I hear most often of advantages of hiring relatives.

Speaker 1: 2:28

But let's, before you get too cozy the idea of a family reunion on staff let's consider some of the potential pitfalls. Okay, first is obviously favoritism and nepotism. Real or perceived favoritism can breed resentment among other staff and congregants and that can undermine morale and trust. I look at a lot of church webpages and look at a lot of church staff pages and a lot of times if I see five people on staff and three of them have the same last name. I wonder and I don't know if it's true or not because I don't know the churches, I'm just looking at their staff page but I wonder how that's perceived in the church, because it can be real or perceived. Favoritism that can cause some kind of resentment among other staff. Maybe the two people that don't share the last name how do they feel compared to the people that are relatives that are on the same staff. So, favoritism and nepotism, something to think about.

Speaker 1: 3:25

Blurred boundaries it can be difficult to celebrate personal and professional relationships and that can lead to conflicts of interest and challenges with accountability. Families are complicated and sometimes families fight and struggle and if you are struggling with family matters and also staff members on top of it, man, that complicates things in a major way. Limited perspectives Hiring multiple staff members can create kind of an echo chamber and it limits the diversity of thought and potentially shifts, stifles innovation. We talked about strained relationships. Work-related disagreements can spill over into family life and family life disagreements can spill over into church life and that can cause a lot of tension and strain. And finally, increased scrutiny Churches that hire relatives may face some heightened scrutiny from the congregation, from the church, the community, especially if there are any concerns about fairness or transparency.

Speaker 1: 4:31

How do you navigate this? Should you just say no, we're fine with it. Or should you just say no, we're not ever going to allow family members to serve on our paid staff at the same time? How do you navigate this? First is Put your foot down. Establish some clear policies before you're tempted to make a hire. Have that policy before you've got individual names and personalities involved. Create a formal policy outlining expectations and boundaries for hiring relatives, and this should include some clear guidelines of conflicts on conflicts of interest and performance evaluations. Conflicts on conflicts of interest and performance evaluations. Do you want the husband doing the wife's yearly evaluation or the wife doing the son's or aunt's or sister-in-law's annual evaluations? All those kind of reporting structures, all those things. Make sure you have some clear policies before you need to try and put those into place. Maintain transparency. Be transparent with your congregation about your hiring practices and the rationale Number three you need to treat relatives like any other employee.

Speaker 1: 5:39

Hold them to the same standards of performance and accountability as other staff members. And this is when I think it's difficult, because they're not just a staff member. They're your family. What if something goes horribly wrong? And what if there's a moral failure? What if they just don't do their job? Are you willing to terminate a family member? Oh my goodness, that can be a real problem, a real showstopper. Separate work and family life. Establish clear boundaries and then seek outside counsel. Consult with trusted advisors, particularly if you're thinking about hiring one of your family. Consult with trusted advisors, particularly if you're thinking about hiring one of your family. Consult with some trusted advisors, some mentors, even somebody like from a church staff firm that like chemistry like myself, just to ensure you're making some wise decisions here.

Speaker 1: 6:26

So here's the bottom line Hiring relatives. It can be a blessing or a curse, but definitely, even if it's a blessing, it makes things much more complicated. So proceed with caution. Establish some clear policies, maintain transparency and you can possibly harness the potential benefits. As always, if you need any guidance in this area or staffing decisions, want to discuss any kind of unique challenges of hiring relatives or non-relatives, don't ever hesitate to reach out to me. I'm here to be a resource for you. My email address is podcastchemistrystaffing. I'm here to help you. However, I can Remember, family ties are a blessing in ministry, but they also require some wisdom and discernment and some careful navigation. They're a blessing in ministry, but they also require some wisdom and discernment and some careful navigation. So hopefully, by following some of these guidelines, you can create some harmonious work environment where both family and ministry can flourish. Very good, I'm happy that you joined us today here on the podcast. Join us again tomorrow for another edition of the Healthy Church Dad podcast. Have a great day.